The time has come...
It is the day before we set out on our maiden voyage, our first of many hiking tours. I have a tornado of emotions, for the most part, spinning out of control. But every once in a while, I land in the eye of the storm and feel an overwhelming sense of peace. It's a stillness that lets me know it's gonna be alright, we are doing the right thing. Despite what some people may think, despite the lack of encouragement and despite the fear of the unknown, we are certain of this decision. My husband said to me this morning, "I'm nervous. I'm nervous for this trip." My response, "Good! We should be nervous. It means we are doing it right." If we weren't nervous we'd probably be overconfident, which would cause us to overlook some important details. Nerves keep you in check! They keep you grounded. And so with that, we pack up our motor-home, tie up the loose ends at home, check the weather one more time, say a prayer, hope to get some sleep tonight and.... off we go!
Every story has a beginning. They often happen in a moment, a moment that forever changed your life. Maybe it was a job opportunity, meeting someone for the first time, a pregnancy test, a commitment to your faith.. whatever it was, you remember and can re-live it like it was yesterday.
I have several of those life-changing moments, but the one I want to talk about happened at the grocery store. It was the moment I realized I didn't want to do "this" anymore. I was standing outside the front doors, waiting for my husband to pick me up. I began to people watch. As people were going in and coming out, I thought to myself, "What is it that makes them tick? What charges their batteries? Are they living their lives with passion? Are they doing what they love?" As people shuffled in and out, I couldn't help but notice that every face I encountered looked about the same.. non-expressive, plain, tight-lipped, lacking life. It was the look of "just doing what I do every day".
I got in the car and quickly announced to my husband, "I don't want to live like this anymore!" Poor guy.. I completely caught him off guard! He was probably thinking, "oh great, another mommy meltdown." Ha! I do have a few of those from time to time. But I digress.. let's get back on track...
"I don't want to live like this anymore!" A job, house, dishes, mortgage, bills, doctor appointments, grocery shopping, laundry, ENDLESS laundry!!! Go to sleep and do it again, day after day after day. Don't get me wrong - I love the fact that we have the freedom to live our lives in this manner, as Americans, but for myself, I was not content in that routine. My wander-lusting heart needed more.
I absolutely love being a stay-at-home mom and wouldn't trade it for the world BUT to see the world, I'll gladly trade in the thinking that I can't experience it due to this stage of life. It was in that moment, that day at the grocery store, that I knew our family would do things differently. I knew we were about to embark on a journey, a journey to our new normal! As we head out on the road, we don't know exactly what the future holds but we do know this - we are going to MAKE IT HAPPEN! Our car is no longer parked.
As the Lord directs our steps, so we will go. Not our will Lord but Yours be done. As long as the light is green, we will move forward, one adventure at a time.
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